Day Six of the Seven Project.... Wow. One one hand I feel proud. I am proud because I've made it. Not just made it through Seven, but I'm surviving one of the most terrible situations I've ever endured, and the proverbial crap hit the fan the day before starting this project. Not sure why I decided to stay with it - probably because my mom and a few others were going to, and I wanted to do the whole 7 months and do it well. I wasn't 100% sure I would stick with the project until I was staring down the last of my 20 oz. Coke Zero thinking I should finish it before it was too late, the night before the dawn of Seven. Then I realized it was 12:15. Since it was past midnight, I just couldn't do it. I felt like I'd be breaking Seven before even starting. So I went to bed.
It's been six days since I've indulged in my biggest weaknesses - Coke Zero and peanut M&Ms. Because of the situation we're going through, I pretty much wake up and go to bed with a stomach ache, which helps me not want to eat anything. However, as I adjust and rely on my faith that God will bring about something good even when we can't see it, I'm getting an appetite back. I'm also getting pretty sick of my seven - eggs, chicken, spinach, sweet potatoes, apples, avocado, and whole grain bread.
Last night, we went to the store to replenish our avocado supply. I really was more aware of all the choices, both healthy and unhealthy, that we are bombarded with in the store. It was cool to realize that the things that we catching my attention were things like steak and strawberries. I'd like to think that's what I'd go for first if I weren't following the restrictions of Seven. But realistically, I know I'd probably go grab a giant bag of peanut M&Ms and a Coke Zero instead. And that is part of why I want to stick with this. If I can eat healthy food, with serious restrictions for 30 days, then hopefully my return to acting like a normal member of society will involve healthier food than I was previously choosing. When a friend was stress eating chocolate and I wasn't because of Seven, I commented on the timing of it all. "Things happen for a reason," was her response. So true. I'd be eating my face off right now. Seven is something I can control, when some other things are not in my hands. (But they're in God's hands, so I will try to let go!) What I really want in my hands right now is not the spinach and chicken I happen to be eating....
I had to walk past brownies twice before eating my lunch. Once to get my new BFF, water. The second time, to warm up this dear, sweet, icky piece of chicken that I'm munching on as I type. I found myself talking to the brownies. I don't even remember what I said to them, but I had to tell them a word or two. I found myself becoming a little crazy around the brownies, urging the guy whose birthday it is to please eat them all so they could GO AWAY.
This reminds me of our trip to the store last night. I found myself gazing at the bacon like it was my first love. "Bacon, I love you!" I actually said it out loud. Ugh. Wow. So I'm sitting here with my tall glass of water, on my lunch break at school, munching on spinach leaves like they're chips, and chicken like it's...well....chicken. I ate about a half a piece.
That's another weird thing about Seven. I don't really feel like eating. Sometimes I wait until my stomach growls or I feel like I'm gonna throw up, and then I make myself eat. Again, that may be part of my life situation, or it may be a side effect of Seven. My guess is that it's a little of both.
I wish I was vain enough to do this solely for weight loss reasons. I know I'm dropping pounds, and that things that were getting tight are gonna fit me again. I guess that will be good, since next month I pick seven articles of clothing to rotate throughout the month. For now, that's also a somewhat motivating factor for me.
The best motivation, I think, is the facebook group Seven that we created. My mom and a few friends from her church are also embarking on this journey. A couple days before we started, I was cracking up at all the silliness we were writing in anticipation of this thing. My 9 year old son was even reading over my shoulder, cracking up. If you are interested, let me know and I can add you to the Seven group.
For now, I need to end this. I'm writing on a lunch break, and though I still have half a piece of chicken sitting here, I don't think I even feel like eating it. Goldfish crackers.... I feel like eating those. And the Star Jar....I want chocolate! (We have this blessed giant glass jar called the Star Jar at work, and it's filled to the rim with candy and chocolate. It used to be my teaching assistant. Now I try not to look at it.)
Oh, speaking of chocolate. I will admit that probably the weirdest thing I've done during Seven was related to chocolate. Rubencito had eaten a Tootsie Roll, and his breath smelled so good. I actually smelled his breath and just took it all in....twice!
So...I'll try to blog again when I find myself doing other things that may amuse you, my friends. Now please, go eat some chocolate for me!
No comments:
Post a Comment